I can’t believe I’m about to share the extremely deep personal corners of my life with you all.

Prepared to be terrified.

I’ve got the yucks. Bad. I’m sure I won’t have to go into detail the symptoms, I’m sure you get it. Two nights ago my stomach started hurting terribly bad. I spent half the evening between the couch and the bathroom. I had a headache and my body ached. No fun. Yesterday I came prepared, tylenol and pepto in hand. I was going to beat this crap (heehee). I was miserable all day. I didn’t think i was going to make it through the day.

Okay, confession time. I hate, hate, absolutely loathe doing anything other than peeing in public bathrooms, and even then I line the seat with toliet paper 50 million times or squat. I don’t know why I have such a huge complex, but I refuse to “use use” the bathroom in public restrooms. I could be turing blue and have internal posioning, twitching my left leg and seeing stars, and I still wouldn’t go. I kept praying I would be okay all day. Everytime my stomach rumbled or gurgled or made this strange feeling that I can’t even explain I just drank more pepto. Yeah, I’m sure that was real great for me too.

Well yesterday I had my mom pick me up a few minutes early. i thought I was going to die. The way home couldn’t get easier, but of course something bad would happen when I was holding my breath, praying I wouldn’t lose it in the car: we get lost.

Not only do we get lost, but we get lost in a residential with no paved roads because my mom, “Knew a shortcut.”

Thanks.

So the whole time I kept praying that I would faint and not go all over myself because at least fainting is way more socially acceptable. “Please just let me faint. PLEASE, I just want to freaking faint!” I really did say that. What a weirdo.

So we finally get home and I was sick sick. I was miserable. My sweet Will was able to come home early last night so he was there when we got home. I always give him a huge hug and welcome when I first see him, and I was totally thrilled that he had come home early, but all I could say was, “yay! You’re home early! I’m sick!” and then ran to the bathroom.

Last night I took some Aleve (thank God for Aleve, the most amazing fever reducer, headache helper, and body ache killer), but still felt sick in my stomach. Will was eating an ice cream bar when the phone rang. He went to get it and I thought, “Maybe that would make me feel better.” Yeah, because ice cream is the best antibiotic, right? So, I took a bite (he had told me earlier, “Please don’t eat after me because I don’t want to get sick.” opps.) Anyway, I didn’t think I was contagious sick, I thought it was more of a Brittny internal thing- does that make sense?

We go to bed and at midnight Will totally scares me. He throws off the covers and runs to the bathroom. I think to myself, “Crap. He is going to be so mad at me.” He was up for over an hour with the yucks too. I was convinced I had made him sick, and so was he. This morning he was a little mad at me. I seriously did not mean to make him sick, like I said, I didn’t think i was contagious!

Anyway, I KNEW I was sick today because you’llnever in a million years guess what I did… yes… I went in a public bathroom.I was that desparate. Not once… Not twice… Three times. Wow. That is a huge and amazing feat for me. I need a T-Shirt that says, “I did my duty in an army bathroom.” I knew right then I was really sick because there was no other way I would let myself do that. That is the worst thing to do ever for me (I know, I’m weird). You are basically going to the bathroom in front of everyone in the same room. Okay, so they don’t see you, but they are still there to share the intimate moment with you. how awkward. I so wish I could tell you my bathroom story it is pretty funny, but I think I’m sharing enough right now and I would be even more embarrassed to tell you al that, so I’ll just skip that moment.

Today I actually had a lunch date! Yay! I went to lunch with the girl that I had met from my newcomers briefing. I had such a good time and I laughed the entire hour. It takes me a while to fully and totally open up to people I’ve just met, but for some reason I just let loose. Probably because it’s been so very long since I’ve had an Friend-HEI. I probably scared her with my friendliness. Anyway, I told her about my problem and she totally shocked me with a , “ME TOO!! I’ve had it for 2 weeks!!” 2 weeks!? I can’t have this junk for that long. I would have withered up and died by then. Apparently it is a form of dehydration. We just need to be drinking lots more water than we are now-a whole lot more!  I drink my 8 a day, but I know I need more, especially being in the desert. So, that is the cure. She said she had been drinking more water since yesterday and she still had it, so it was probably going to take another day or two for everything to clear out, especially since the yucks make you lose lots of water too. So, I’m pretty sure that is what I have too. That so sucks. That means I have to endure this for a few more days! I am going home and am going to drink 8 bottles of water. water is free here, so there is no reason why I shouldn’t be drinking more- except that I already pee once an hour as it is and only drink about 3 bottles at work.

I can’t wait to tell Will that is what he probably has too. He never ever drinks water, and I’m sure his body is not fully adjusted to the middle of nowhere desert camp yet. He drinks cokes all day, so I’m hoping that is what he has going on too. After I was in tears from talking about our recent public “bathroom and the yucks” experiences, I made her go to the PX with me to get some Imodium. I’m also not good at that. I know, that’s weird. I would nomally have to buy like 3 things along with the Imodium so I wouldn’t feel like people are staring at me thinking, “Look at that girl, she’s running all over the place and had to get some Immodium. heh. Sucks to be her!“, but I was so desperate that I just went and got it and hid it as we stood in line laughing about our preventable ailment. She is new too, so like me, so it was so nice to laugh with someone that literally was going through the same thing I was and having to deal with coworkers that just kept looking ta you weird everytime you get up to leave the room.

For example, I have to share the office with another dept apart from mine. Everytime I got up to use the bathroom today (I “went went” 3 times, but I have to go so much after drinking a bottle of water or two also) this lady kept asking me, “where are you going?” It wasn’t rude question the way she asked it, but it got annoying fast because first she is not in my department, and second it really isn’t a lot of her business. The last time she asked me I was so tempted to say, “Look here lady, I have fountain-like, thundering, explosive diarreha from not drinking enough water, and now I’m going to go unload myself on an innocent, unsuspecting toliet if you don’t mind. DO you want to come!!??” I really came close to saying that. I think she would have died from shock in her chair.

I haven’t fully unleashed my true self in the office yet I guess.

I can only pray things get better. I got a 1.5 liter of water to drink the rest of the day, I better be dried up like the Kuwait Desert by tomorrow dang it.

Okay, so now not only am I terribly shocked and embarrased that I decided to share that with you, but I’m sure you are all have this weird unsettled feeling now that you made it through my sick, disgusting blog.

I’m a weirdo, what can I say.

I might try and get some pictures up of our Qatar trip, they turned out great! We’ll see though.

Have a great day!

And DRINK LOTS OF WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DRINK LOTS OF WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DRINK LOTS OF WATER!