I’m about to offend about 85% of you- so I apologize in advance. Please don’t hate me after reading this post. Simply agree. If you don’t agree, well, then I’m afraid I’ll have to come to your house and force compliance. This forced compliance I speak of will involve a lot of John Tesh cds and socks recovered from the army gym three weeks ago. For both our sakes- please, PLEASE agree.
I hate bluetooth ear pieces.
No, wait.
I DESPISE bluetooth ear pieces.
In fact- if you have one of those Secret Service freaking ear goiters in your ear right now, please, dispel of it right away.
Or at least until you’re done reading.
Guys- they’re driving me crazy!
Crazy, Crazy, Crazy!
Now- they’ve gotten on my nerves ever since they came out, but today- today I’ve been tempted to run up and down the halls of my work playing the role of the Ear Piece Bandit.
No wait- the Ear Piece Thief. That sounds even better.
Today I’ve fallen prey to the stupid freaking bluetooth ear pieces not once, but twice.
Maybe you poor souls have fallen prey to Attack of the Talking Ear Piece too?… If so I apologize.
I’ll tell you what happened during the 2nd attack. I call it The Accidental Join-in Attack.
I had to deliver a document to one of the “big wigs” in my company. I walked into his office with a friendly smile, information in hand.
He looked directly at me and said, “So what are you going to do about it?”
I gave him a look of confusion. “Well, I can set these on the table, if that will work.”
“That’s not good enough!” he replied.
I was baffled. Well! What the crap do you expect me to do!? Serve the papers at your feet while holding a tray of assorted grapes, cheeses, and olives!?!
“Well.. I could-” I began…
Ouch. I got the abrupt cut-off.
“Hang on. Someone is in my office” he said, clearly annoyed at my confusion. He took the papers, looked me in the eye. “Anything else?” he asked.
“No. Not at all.”
I turned around to leave but then stopped.
“Actually! There IS one thing you could do. You could warn someone that you’re on the phone for crying out freaking loud!! What a CRAZZZZY thought- right!?! I mean REALLY- you’re not THAT important. Can’t you hold the desk phone like all us “commoners” do? Ugh. This is your final warning. If I catch you pulling anymore Accidental Join-in Attacks on anyone else. Well, you don’t want to know what could happen.”
I then angrily stormed out.
...
Okay, I’m lying. The truth is that I really wanted to say that, but instead humbly said no and walked out of the office.
So you want to wear a fancy schmancy ear piece. Fine. But c’mon- can’t we establish some sort of social set of rules for these freaking things?
RULES! I NEED RULES PEOPLE!
I accept that these are becoming an “integral” part of society- like the cellphone, laptop, and jeans on Casual Fridays- but I think we need to monitor our freaking usage.
I mean, okay, so you want to talk and drive a car using both hands. Understandable. But really, do we have to have the ear piece glued to our face everytime we make a move?
I think ear piece wearers gotta let people know they’re on the phone the second non ear piece wearers start joining in on the conversation, innocently thinking you’re talking to them. We can’t fault the innocent Join-Ins for not knowing someone is on the phone.
I rest my case. I think we both know I could ramble on, but really- it’s not necessary.
Thanks, I feel better now. In fact, I feel a freaking extra-normal life update post in my future. Perhaps Wednesday.
test.
TEST
ARE YOU WORKING YET!?!