Okay guys- it’s Monday Confession.

I have a major crush.

I’ve got it bad, guys. Real bad.

I have a super major couple crush on the people that are going to become our bestest friends in the whole wide world over here.

They just don’t know it yet.

There is this couple I simply adore (granted, I’ve seen them for like a total of 5 minutes- but hey! when it’s love, it’s love, am I right?).

Here’s the story.

This February, when we went to the Super Bowl, we flew home out of D.C. Well, as we prepared to board I noticed the cutest couple ever!

AKA our “bestest friends in the whole wide world over here that just don’t know it yet (Crap! That’s a long name for this couple. They’re worth it though. Well… I hope so… see, I’ve kinda sorta never exactly spoken to them just yet. We’ll get to that later.)!”

They’re probably around our age. They were a nice looking couple. They appeared to be poised, smart, and adorable- you know, a great freaking couple that everyone wants to hang out with!

So I was half tempted to throw myself all over them like a cheap college tramp after a few too many drinks at a Tri-Del party- but I refrained. Afterall, what would I have said? “Uh- hiya. I see you’re about to board a plane to Kuwait. Whatdoyouknow- so are we!” and then tell them about how we just came from the Super Bowl?

Um- I prefer to hide this football obsession from people until I know we’re life-long friends. Plus, I was looking incredibly rough (I mean, who likes to travel 18 hours dressed to the nines?), and the wife looked super cute. Double Plus- they were flying 1st class and we were in the freaking back of the plane next to someone that smelled like bacon and cooler ranch doritos. That’s not exactly the first impression I wanted to make.

In the midst of smelly bacon-dorito-back-of-the-plane funk, my crush began.

After we landed in Kuwait, the entire plane crowded around the baggage claim all looking for the exact same black Samsonite suitcase. I once again noticed the couple, and once again thought to myself, “I really want them to be our friends, darn it!” We stood near each other as our husbands found and loaded our luggage, but no words were exchanged. Sigh. That was the end of the story.

Or so I thought!

A few months later, we came across them again. This time it was at the Sultan Center. “Wow! We have so much in common! We both ride planes and we buy groceries at the Sultan Center!” See, guys? We’re a match made in Heaven.

So, as I was perusing the dairy section I did a quick cart check. You gotta know what your best friends are putting into their bodies, right? Well, they passed the cart test. If I had any doubts they were a great couple worthy of our Friday nights, they were diminished the second I saw their produce.

So, I looked like a freaking drooling moron at the store that day. I just can’t seem to get over how incredibly normal these people look, and I can’t stop wondering, “What in the WORLD these people are doing here? They’re so normal! Just like us!” Normal Americans are not common in this country. Hence why I’m practically laying myself in front of these people.

Anyway- So yeah, we saw them again. Nothing happened, though. Just a simple cart check that ended up with me hiding underneath their cart trying to secretly place our phone number into their lunch meat while they strolled about the cereal aisle living their lives (and wondering how their cart suddenly got so heavy).

Just kidding about the cart thing.

Don’t think I didn’t consider it, though.

And then? Then there was this weekend.

Another few months had passed since my last bestest friend ever spotting, and quite honestly I had forgotten that there was hope in finding a nice young couple in this country. Will and I decided to celebrate the end of Ramadan and the re-opening of civilization during the day by going to Chilis for lunch Saturday. We got there soon after it opened and had the place practically to ourselves. We sat down, and you’ll never guess in a million years who was sittng across from us!

YES!

OUR BEST FRIENDS EVER!

Okay, not directly across from us- there was a table in between, but still- we were practically having lunch together, guys!

Anyway, I know I sound like an incredibly OBSESSIVE high school girlfriend, but I think they noticed us too.

...

Or maybe I’m just telling myself that so I feel better.

I finally cracked and told Will about my crush. He never knew I had scouted out our newest friends. I told him the whole story and he responds with, “Huh. I never noticed them at the airport. Who are they again?”

Sigh.

I feel like I’m talking to a wall sometimes.

After re-explaining my story and once again hearing from Will that he didn’t remember ever seeing these people, I gave up. I mean really, guys, what was I going to do? Proudly get up, walk to their table, sit right next to the wife and introduce myself?

“HI! I’m Brittny. I know you don’t know me, but I’ve been in love with you guys from the first moment they called your boarding pass in D.C. this winter.

You fly.

We fly.

You shop at the Sultan Center.

We shop at the Sultan Center.

You eat at Chilis.

We eat at Chilis.

Mmm, fries (reaching onto her plate and shoving one in my mouth)! I love those too! See! It’s like we were seperated at birth! All you have to do now is tell me your husband loves football and we’ll make you the godparents of our firstborn!”

Yeah- try making that conversation not sound stalkerish!

Totally not going to happen.

Will thought I was a total goof for crushing so much. I guess it is a little silly. Why can’t we at least run in the same circles! Do you know how impossible it is to befriend people who don’t even know you’re alive!? Seriously!

So, lunch was over and I bid our friends “goodbye” as Will once again made fun of my incredible dorkiness.

After lunch it was off to the Sultan Center for groceries. Same old story, nothing exciting. As I went to grab some yogurt, you’ll never guess who in the WORLD I saw!

Yep!

Our best friends.

(insert Twilight Zone music)

What are the odds! 4 sightings in a country of one million people?

Is it a sign?

Are we destined to keep running into each other until one of us gets brave and says something?

Weird!

This time I swear there was a look. They totally knew who we were. At last! They remembered us!

(insert hallelujah chorus)

Everything got all slow motion-y and hazy and they slowly pushed their cart towards us, it was like one of those terrible teenage love movies.

Sigh. Love, I tell you. Love.

SCREECH!

My odd little dream sequence came to a quick halt.

Unfortunately, we had gotten a head start on our shopping and were headed for the check out line. They, however, were just getting started with their shopping.

Sigh.

Another bust.

Um, so guys? Question. Does this give me the right to say a friendly, “Hello (and nothing more I swear! I promise not to open my stupid mouth and say anything dumb)” if we ever cross paths again? Hmm…

Because you know what? I’m such a freaking chicken and will never say anything, not even hello, because I’m so timid. How dumb, right? I definetly have “hello” rights, though.

Right?

What’s the worse they could say?

Nothing?

That’s not so bad. They seem so normal that I doubt either of them would begin rotating their heads and spitting pea soup at us or anything.

Hello is safe. Hello it is.

(proudly proclaiming) My name is Brittny, and I’m going to say hello.

So, once again our paths crossed, and once again nothing happened.

Later that afternoon, I brought up the subject again. Will repeated what he said earlier that day, “I think it’s just you that notices people, Britter. I bet they’re just like me and don’t even remember us.”

“I bet you’re wrong!”

(sarcastically), “Yeah. I bet they’re having this exact conversation right now.”

“You know what!? I bet they ARE! I mean, who wouldn’t want to be our friends!?!”

-Pause-

Huge Eruption of Laughter.

“Alright, alright. I guess I better just stick to admiring from afar. I am going to say hi if we ever see them again, though. They are, afterall, our bestest friends in the whole world!”

Just FYI I might not be posting from Thursday night-Saturday night. I’ll be camping out at the Sultan Center in hopes of another sighting.

Ha ha just kidding!

(sort of)