I love Will, but we definitely have to work on our nonverbal communication skills.

I used to be a big Mad About You fan when the show was on. Paul and Jamie were so fun together. There is a specific episode in which I draw today’s post. In it, Paul and Jamie are at a party and have split up to talk to other people. They have these “couple signals“ to give eachother incase they are in a boring or sticky situation. For example, if they ran their fingers through their hair it meant something like, “Get me out of here, I’m dying!“ They had a few more, but you get my point. Anyway, Paul ends up telling this lady their secret signals not knowing it is some big producer that he wants to work for. Jamie ends up talking to her later and ferociously starts running her fingers through her hair to Paul, who is across the room. Busted. Paul didn’t get the gig.

Anyway, I recap that entire episode because I watched it pre-marriage. I think all men should have to watch this episode. As you will see, Will missed it.

Tonight we were all sitting around the table eating supper. We sat around eating and talking for almost two hours. I’m dying here. Not only because I’ve been sitting at the table for 2 hours, but because my parents may as well have escorted me to the asylum with their talk about my whole job situation. They went over it over and over and over and.... you get my point. My right eye is twitching with frustration. My dad says something that just pushes me over the edge, so I do “it.“ The signal. It wasn’t a signal we have ever discussed but I figured any normal breathing person can figure out what it means.

I slowly slide my leg over and give Will a little kick.

“Ow! What did you kick me for!?“

My thoughts: You are blowin’ it! What are you doing letting me out to dry! Thanks hun!

“Nothing,“ I say nonchalantly.

Paused silence at the dinner table. “Did I say something?“ my dad asks.

“No, dad.“

Will then says, “I’m not saying anything else for the rest of the night,“ thinking I kicked him because of something he had said. (sigh) How hard can this be?

So conversation resumes for another 15 minutes and continues to be about work related issues that deal with me. I’m freaking out by this point and am ready to scream. Then someone says something that just is icing on the cake at this point, so if I don’t give Will a “Can you believe they just said that“ kick under the table I am going to lose it.

I go in, slowly and carefully. Kick.

“What did I do, Britt!?“

My sister, who understand what these “kicks“ mean ( I should have been kicking her instead of Will tonight apparently- it would have kept me out of trouble) has an entire conversation with me through the “look.“ I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. If you have a sister you’ve had these “discussions“too.  It basically said, “I can’t believe he doesn’t get that you’re trying to tell him you are annoyed with the comments!“

So then it doesn’t matter because everyone knows I was annoyed with the comment.

“Don’t you know that when you kick someone after another person says something it is a quiet signal! You AREN’T supposed to say anything. It is a way for a wife to tell her husband something without having to say it. I means, ‘We’ll talk about this later,’ or ‘I can’t believe she just said that!’ I figured you would understand. If I wanted everyone to know I was upset i would have nudged your elbow on the table so everyone could see.“

So much for being discrete.

We will have to work on this nonverbal stuff.