i wish you knew how badly I wanted to talk about work right now.

It’s taking every muscle in my fingers to hold me back from posting about where I work, but I must refrain.

Sigh.

It would make for an interesting post.

Everyday here would make for an interesting post.

It mostly goes back to the riding to work issues I mentioned the other day. I’ll stop there because if I don’t I will go on a dangerous ramble.

Please save me now. I feel like I’m being viewed as satan’s helper for needing a ride to work (EVERYONE needs a ride to work, we all share cars here, but my ride situatuion is about to change… okay enough with confusing you)

So, what can I post about to take my mind off my worries? I’m terrible at just not thinking about something. I don’t let go of stress and worries well. I cling to them. Right now I’m worrying away.

Okay, I’ll stop. No more.

Hump Day. I don’t so much feel like I’m over the hump though. I feel like I’m trying to make it up the hill, but my wheels keep sliding back to the bottom again. I wish I could call you and have a major nestie phone conference or something. It’s not like my day was horrible or anything, I just sort of feel beat down and after working here almost 2 months still haven’t really found my place. I don’t really fit in (okay, I sound like a teenage girl in junior high or something) It’s not like, “ oh poor Brittny, she doesn’t have any friends“ or anything, but I just don’t have a place really. I don’t mean that in a bad way. I’ve met nice people, but I haven’t really found someone I can relate to or that is close to my age.

I also wonder how those around me view me because I rarely have work to do (which is another story I can’t really talk about). I’m constantly asking my boss if he needs me to do anything, but I rarely get something, or I get told there is something for me to do, but he’ll get it to me later (never). I worry that people think I’m lazy here, which is so not true. I WANT to work, but I have little to do. When I walk into this particular office I feel all this bad tension like for some reason I’m viewed as this ditz that doesn’t do her job or something. I don’t know. I worry about a lot of things, so maybe I’m blowing things out of proportion. I hope so. I just don’t know If I’m liked here, which really bothers me because I think I’m a likable person.

AGH!

Hmmm- did I say I wasn’t going to talk about work? So much for that.

Sorry guys- work posts are sort of “blah.” After all- we’re all already at work ourselves and then we are going to READ about work? Yeah, sign me up for that one.

Okay, so as much as I would love to vent and share my heart about this stuff with you, I’ll shut up.

Now that I’m shutting up about all that, I don’t have much else to say.

I started a new boxset that I watch while I wait for Will to come home. Curb Your Enthusiasm Season One. My boss let me borrow them because he says I remind him of the wife on the show. I watched the first couple and thought they were sort of dumb, but now I have one episode in the set left and I really like it a lot. I am actually considering getting the 2nd season. Tonight I’m watching the final show, and then I’ll be back to boredom on the weeknights. I’m going to have to start a new series- or we just need to finally get cable. That is what we need.

Okay, so that is my overly exciting post for today.I feel like a dork for being like, “Oh Wah. Brittny has no ‘place’ poor her.” Sorry if it sounded that way!

I am so ready to go home. Home to my apartment and “real home” back in Oklahoma. These two months have left me feeling lousy and crappy when it comes to work, which totally sucks.

YOU SURVIVED!

Pity Party Officially Over

Have a good day.