In case you have been living in a cave for the last week and a half- the Sooners lost in quite an embarrassing ball game.

I guess that’s one of the risks you take when you fly all the way to another state to watch a football game- your team might lose! I felt bad for the people behind us. They went to the game last year in which the Sooners lost too. They went on and on about the whole thing.

Because I realize the majority of my audience could care less about football and terrible offense and idiotic play calling (ie: the onside kick- what the crap was that anyway!?!) I will digress. The trip was still nice. Phoenix winter weather reminds me of Kuwait winter weather. It was very enjoyable.

So the title of this post has a tiny bit to do with being a bit bowled over with the Fiesta Bowl, but a lot more to do with simply just being bowled over in frustration and annoyances with events that have recently taken place back at the home base.

A few days ago I was preparing to write a post about how great my MIL is. Oh, and while we’re on that subject- I’ve decided to refer to her simply as “Pat” in future posts. Pat- as in Pat Macdougle (sp!?) from Everybody Loves Raymond. It’s like they’re sisters, guys.

Anyway, I had prepared to write a really nice post about her and a conversation we had, and how although she drives Will crazy at times, she really means well and blah blah blah. That, however, was until I had a conversation with my FIL that placed the entire post in a big disgusting clogged toilet.

^ Oh and speaking of toliets- so far so good with the no toilet situations this trip. Well, sort of. It’s a long story that I ought not to open up right now as I have a feeling this post will be quite long. Let’s just say the toilet flushes really funny now- but the victory is the fact that it still flushes. Right? Okay, back to the matter at hand.

Oh- and before I begin- I need a disclaimer. I realize Will’s parents have our interests in mind and all that crap, but I’m not really writing with that in mind. I’m pretty much just writing in anger and the sheer need to blow off steam. After I post this and get it off my mind I’ll go back to being fine and knowing they care for us, they’re great, and all that other stuff.

Where do I even start?…

I haven’t told Will any of what I’m about to share. Mainly because I don’t want him to feel as though I went to his mom behind his back (it wasn’t like that at all), and secondly because he and his dad are very close.I’m not even really sure how things got started, but I think it best not to vent to him about the whole thing. So, that means YOU are the lucky friends that I’m confiding in. Yes, the entire internet.

Okay so the other day Will went to see an old friend and run a few errands. Pat asked if I wanted to go along to Wal-Mart with her to do some shopping. As a person living in Kuwait where Wal-Mart does not exist, I’m not one to pass up such an offer, so I opted to tag along.

Mistake number one.

The trip was just fine. Nothing overly exciting, simply walking up and down aisles and talking about food- so thrilling, right? Anyhow, on the way home we got into a real serious conversation about some things that have been on my heart about Will, the future, and a few more other personal things. You can probably understand why I want to keep this matter sort of ambiguous, but to sum it up it was about God’s plan for me and Will and if perhaps God is still tugging him to return to full time ministry and how Will might not be listening. Another issue was about finances and spending money on what seems to me as unnecessary things. I had never revealed a lot of these thoughts to anyone. It seemed odd that I would release such personal insights to Will’s mom, considering a lot of the conversation circled around him, however, at the same time it felt good to let go.

Mistake number two.

Why!? Why Brittny!?! Do you guys realize what an idiot I am!? I know you’re reading this and thinking to yourself, “Brittny is a freaking idiot MORON!” Yes, I know. You don’t have to remind me. I fully realize I violated EVERY

SINGLE

MIL-DIL RELATIONAL RULE.

It’s like cardinal rule number one: Do not EVER under ANY circumstance share absolutely anything personal with your mother-in-law regarding her son.

Ugh, I’m cringing just thinking about the fact that I actually shared such information with Pat. I feel dirty- like 34 showers in a 2 hour time span would still leave me feeling all grimy for the whole thing. Cardinal rule number one guys! What was I thinking!?!

Anyway, we talked the whole way home about these things and God’s plan and things we out to pray for, etc. It was just a nice conversation. I could tell she knew exactly what I was saying, and I could understand the thoughts she was sharing as well because I often felt the same things. As we turned onto her street, I teared up and told her how thankful I was that we were able to talk and share such thoughts about Will and God’s plan, etc.

The whole family had a wonderful evening and had cherry pie with a heaping scoop of vanilla ice cream and all sat out on the porch holding hands and singing “Michael Row the Boat Ashore.”

The end.

Ha.

So, truthfully, I really did think that was the end of the conversation- “E.O.D” as my parents like to say (End Of Discussion).

Only, I forgot I married into Will’s side of the family in which nothing is ever really
“E.O.D.”

Again- yelling “Idiot” at myself- I should have known all this stuff by now!

See, in Will’s family things are done differently. For the sake of time I will sum it up by saying issues are usually brought up to one person of the family, and then another person, primarily Will’s dad, will bring the issue to light in generally a more private setting in hopes of clearing the air, etc. The whole thing annoys me, but hey- it’s better than what my family does which is simply suppress everything and never talk about issues and be perfectly fine with never ever doing so to keep happiness and peace among all (which isn’t always the best decision either- uh reference all Summer of 2005 posts).

Do you see where I’m going with this thing?

Yeah… I think you do…

So the day after my deep and meaningful conversation with dear old “mom,” I decided to go for a walk to get some exercise. As I was heading towards my desired walking trail, Will’s dad caught me outside.

Yes- his dad.

I thought he was going to tag along to show me the path to walk along. I wasn’t really thinking anything else.

As we started to walk he began with a booming introduction- one no doubt he might have practiced before deciding to escort me into the woods- WHERE THERE WOULD BE NO WITNESSES when he kicked the living crap out of every ounce of my freaking pride.

Okay- sorry- where were we? Ah- the introduction.

So, he started out with this introduction about Will’s grandpa that farmed, and how he always seemed to have an issue with his full-grown son-also a farmer- buying a new truck for himself all the time when it probably wasn’t the wisest decision. He went on a little longer but summed it up saying that Will’s grandpa came to the conclusion that sometimes that shiny new truck was all his son was working for to get him through long days and tough times.

“Oh crap,” I thought to myself, “I know exactly where this is going.”

“Pat!” I cursed to myself in my best Seinfeld “Neuman-esque” manner. “That Pat had sold me down the river!”

Will’s dad went on to talk about how Will is working hard right now and how sometimes buying things that don’t make sense to some make sense to him because that’s what help him get through the day while we’re in Kuwait. Blah blah blah- we went about 2 laps around the path having this conversation that is best summed up in the above sentence. Actually- it was more him talking, and me providing flabbergasted, “Uh-huhs.”

I know this whole thing doesn’t seem bad when you read it. Heck, I re-read it and it doesn’t seem that bad to me either, but at that instant I felt extremely put on the spot and really angry about the whole thing. Granted, a lot of it was my fault for opening my big fat mouth and thinking I could let my MIL in the circle of trust (HA!), but still- it’s a freaking circle of trust, dang it- keep it a freaking circle, not a horseshoe!

Alright- I also know that when you share something with someone, it’s generally a given that person tells their spouse. That’s like an unspoken rule I think we all know. However, it ends there! It goes in the vault never to be brought up again! Unless you’re freaking breaking the law or hurting someone- keep that crap in the freaking vault! Right!?

Okay- so back to the conversation-

I was so shocked that he would approach me in such a manner and defend a situation in which he didn’t know all the facts. How dare he come to me and say “such and such is the reason why Will buys things sometimes and it should be okay since that’s the reason” when I didn’t solicit such input!? Plus- don’t justify someone else’s behavior. I didn’t ask for the analysis!

First of all- the whole issue isn’t a big deal at all. We rarely spend money over there and it seemed to me that Pat had blown the whole thing out of proportion. I had no idea my comment would be taken in such a way. Secondly- mind your own business! I know exactly why my husband does the things he does and I don’t need a freaking analogy to drive it home! I already knew all that crap- and he’s right! His hobby DOES help him get through tough days in Kuwait- you’re not telling me anything I don’t already know! That wasn’t even the issue that Pat and I really discussed, it was more about ministry- so why in the world did she choose to focus on something that wasn’t really the main issue of our discussion?

I was so shocked that Will’s dad felt the need to get me- the perceived unsupportive wifezilla- alone to have a semi-intervention on a subject that didn’t need to be addressed. I didn’t really know what to say. As I mentioned before- I come from a family that first of all gets along fine, and second of all isn’t really into confronting situations in such a way- so instead of flying off the handle and taking out his bad knee, I just stayed silent and provided a lot of, cold, “Uh-huhs.”

I’m not sure if he could sense my stiff, closed posture or not, but I really don’t care. I was simply flabbergasted by the entire chain of events. I felt like going straight to Pat and letting her have it- rotating head, flying pea soup spewing out of my mouth and all. 

“The real truth is, PAT, I don’t even think I want children! I’ve just been being nice when you’ve dropped all your ‘sly’ hints!” I felt like yelling. Only, I have way more control than that and have no ability to truly be mean to someone (ha- I bet you have a hard time believing that after reading this post though, huh?).

I hate that I’m too nice. It’s truly one of my faults most of the time. Instead of telling Will’s dad what I really thought, I gave him control of the conversation and didn’t say what I was really thinking and now am kicking myself over the whole thing. I often remind myself of Meg Ryan’s character in You’ve Got Mail- never able to say what I want in the moment, but always full of great material 5 minutes after the fact.

I guess that’s why I blog. It probably saves my sanity and relationships- especially when living with family during the holidays.

So I feel better now and I’ve let the whole odd conversation go (though I’m sure you have a hard time believing me. What gave it away? The vowing to never give them grandchildren part??)

Trust me, the whole thing felt worse than it reads right now. It just all rubbed me the wrong way. I know it probably doesn’t seem so bad, and looking back a few days later it really wasn’t (uh- I guess…). It just upset me and seemed a bit inappropriate and unnecessary. Trust me, I’ve definitely learned my lesson- never break the cardinal rule!

A couple nights ago I was extremely ruthless and killed everyone in Monopoly, so I felt a lot better after that. We had a lot of fun playing and it once again reminded me that although the above conversation made me want to launch a brick through the window, I really like Will’s family. I guess I need to focus on the Monopoly days and not the awkward walks in the woods days, huh?

Last night Pat and I watched TV together, and she let me watch whatever mindless show I desired, so that was nice. We ended up watching Jon & Kate Plus Eight (super duper cute!) last night and just had a good time. I know you’re going to have a hard time believing me after my big vent, but I really do like Will’s family and am blessed to have such a good set of in-laws (ha ha, most of the time). I seriously needed to blow off some steam, though.

I feel as though I have SO much more to talk about- like the fact that Dr. Vet totally made a comment about how much I ate at lunch, the toilet story briefly mentioned above, and my big weekend in Dallas with a couple bloggers (!), but I better go.

Do you realize my trip is coming to a big finale very soon? I’m so bummed. It’s always hard to go back, but this time it will be so much harder. I thank you guys so much (Erin- thanks a million) for your prayers. I’m continuing to pray and trust God that He will take care of things at work as I prepare to go back. I have so much more I want us to talk about, but I better go for now. I truly look forward to catching up soon and getting to read about all the fun you guys have been having. I promise! we’ll catch up very soon. Again, sorry guys for being classified as hands down the worst blog friend EVER. I probably won’t get much computer time until the weekend we get back to Kuwait,and I promise to catch up then. Seriously. If I don’t I won’t have any blog friends to meet next time I come home because I won’t have any left!

Thanks for listening to me vent! More to come…