I would now like to take this time to honor the wonderful man Will. He was a good man, and no one could love me better. I always knew there was a risk of losing him to this illness if we married, but love was too strong.

This past fall, the illness grew worse than ever before. Before we were married, it was bad, and I was always there to support him- even during the painful hours of the NFL draft and the embarassing OU vs LSU national championship game, but during the fall- it got worse.

Soon, we received season tickets and were taking weekly trips to Norman for treatment. Oh the agony I felt every Saturday there was an away game! Preparing frozen pizzas and ordering boneless wings… for fear this may be his last meal…

And then, to my dismay college football was over and with the horrible loss to USC he grew weaker… but then the NFL season began, and I thought for sure this would be it.

Fantasy leagues with his friends continued to spread the epidemic. Now, we had to put him on life support ( ie: buy NFL Sunday ticket on DirecTV) in order for him to get through the week. He was up to a 10 or 12 games a week. Now, his fantasy friends were coming over, spreading the germs and making him worse. There had to be an end in sight, but sadly- as I had known for a long time but didn’t want to accept- there is a sport for every season. It was finished.

Sadly, the day has come and he has gone away from us- to the the couch… where he anxiously awaits the NCAA basketball championship, with hopes of beating me in our bracket challenge. I can not cry, because I knew this day was coming. Oh the agony of having a lifeless husband during the NCAA tournament! Will it ever end?

Britt’s Bracket: 13-4

Will’s Bracket: 12-5

At least I can beat him in our brackets- that may carry me through!

Today, like the rest of my post op days, has been uneventful. I actually started some home work so that was good.

And… they’re “letting me out” tomorrow! I actually get to get out of the house! But I’m not too excited, it’s another doctor’s apt. I’m kind of nervous! They’re taking my stitches out and… (this is gross) they are taking two screws they put in last week in each foot… without any pain killers! Agh! The doctor says I will just feel pressur because bone has no feeling- but I’m thinking,” HELLO! My skin has feeling and will feel that screw come out!”

I just pray they don’t have to make an incision to get it out. This sucks so bad, and I will be so glad when my life can go back to normal!

My title is 8 days of ugly- and boy has it ever been. I don’t think I have ever consecutively looked so bad in my entire life. I mean, I’ve had a few days here and there, but never 8 days in a row of looking flat out scary. I have been in nothing but sweats this past week because that is all these freaking shoe cast things will fit over! Then I haven’t shaved- I mean I know it’s winter and we are allowed to cheat, but it’s getting bad. And I haven’t worn a drop of makeup in 8 days or fixed my hair besides blowdrying and straightening. Its a scary sight. My eyebrows need a wax. Bad. I’m a scary sight to see. My self esteem will skyrocket after this whole stupid ordeal is over and I can simply put on real clothes.

Anyway, wish me luck on the scary appointment tomorrow!

Our One Year Anniversary- the day, the memories, and LOTS of reflection
So much “excitement” these last few days. (sadly,not really) I’m still recovering from my surgery and have not been outside since Thursday! Can you believe that!? I’m going crazy in here. I feel like Jack and Wendy in The Shining or something- minus the whole psycho part.

Sunday was our anniversary. It was a “real life” anniversary, that was for sure. I was sad that I was literally homebound and unable to do anything at all- really… anything… but it was still special.

I woke up to clanging pots and pans that morning. Will took this week off, including Sunday, so he didn’t have to go to the church (he is a youth/education pastor), so it was a lazy day. He brought me breakfast in bed to reminisce about our Honeymoon in the Poconos, where they brought breakfast in bed everyday. We had eggs, bacon, and toast- a huge feat for Will who has no idea how to cook (unless he is a REALLY good faker)! We lay in bed for a while just talking and reminiscing about our wedding day.

We just lounged around most of the day. Will napped, and I was able to finally check my email.

After a lazy few hours, Will’s parent’s stopped by with a few things for us to eat over the next few days since I am unable to do anything- and as we have already established Will in the kitchen may lead to a Great Balls of Fire Part II (see one of Sunday’s entries).

They gave us a card and a WalMart gift card- which we have totally come to love over the past year- and then they left. Then Will ordered Applebees to go. We sat on the couch, with my feet propped up, and ate dinner together and talked about some things over this past year. Then we watched the Contender. Will is really into that show.

I was mad because I remembered that our cake top was in my parent’s freezer and I totally forgot all about it- and we’re living there this week while they are gone- and I still forgot it! How crazy. I guess we can still have it- like a belated “good luck” memory! The sad thing is, that will be the most cake I had from our wedding. I only got a few bites- and it was sooo good. :( Hopefully it won’t be all freezerburnt!

Then, I also forgot our wedding video at our house, which was a major bummer to me- even though I’ve seen it a million times. Nonetheless just being together and him taking care of me during this crappy time, and just being able to laugh together and love eachother, and realize that everyday is just as special as our anniversary helped me feel better about our great indoor anniversary. I guess it is one I will never forget that’s for sure!

and now, some reflections…

Being alive is a very expensive thing! I never realized that under my parent’s roof- but wow did I learn quick after our first few months of marriage. I never knew how “fancy“ a dinner at Taco Bueno would seem after having to buy a new air conditioner in August.

I never thought it was possible to cook a cookbook- but (and I’m totally serious) I found a way! I managed to accidentally cook our george foreman cookbook that was left in the grill. What a blonde. But it did make a funny story.

Having OU season tickets were awesome (and sadly, very expensive ) for Will and I. I think it was great for us to get out and enjoy something outside of town together.

I never knew how happy I would be to get cash for a holiday instead of a gift- cash is way better now.

I learned that usually when I say “I’m fine,“ I’m probably not. but when Will says “I’m fine,“ he really is.

I learned that no matter how many times Will has watched the ‘85 or ‘00 OU national championship game on ESPN classic- he will STILL watch it in its entirety and get upset at lousy calls. Such a guy thing.

I have learned that ESPNnews is on loop at night and basically it is the same thing over and over from like 10 at night until the early morning, but we could sit there and flip back on its rotation to watch the exact same thing and Will is like a kid in a candy store.

Boys smell

The top 3 sweetest things from Will this past year:

1. Right after we got married it was Easter, and as a kid (okay okay- even in college) I always got a special easter basket from my fam. Easter morning there was a candy trail down the stairs to our spare bedroom where my surprise easter basket was hiding. How sweet.

2. This past summer I was told to pack a suitcase because there would be a surprise for me when I got home from work. Will booked a room at the Quartz Mountain Lodge and surprised me. It was so romantic and beautiful. It was so beautiful out there that weekend.

3. We were kind of tight this Christmas with extra bills and having to buy gifts for our fam, so we thought the best thing would be to forego buying this glorious, fake Christmas tree in order to save money. I came home after school to a bright, sparkling tree- full of hundreds and hundreds of white lights, Christmas music in the back ground, and Will hiding upstairs to surprise me. Talk about a major surprise.

Okay, enough about all that, I could go on and on about our memories, but I better quit- this blog is soooo long, and I’m still not done.

I can’t believe I’ve been married for a year! How crazy! Time goes by faster as we get older. I guess because we get busier with things we feel are SOO important- but they usually aren’t. This year was awesome.  I am sooo glad we had premarital counseling Will’s pastor he grew up with before we got the job at Central. He is such a godly man with so much insight, and he really helped us be aware of soooo many things a lot of couples don’t think about before they get married. Like, I never thought that we would have to buy 2 separate tootpastes because he squeezes from the middle and I squeeze from the bottom. Or, that men and women communicate TOTALLY on two different levels- totally! I’m a communication major, and I always had the “head knowledge” of it, but wow- my professor weren’t lying.

I would recommend to everyone to read The 5 Love Languages.  The author is such an awesome man, and I really believe that everyday can be like “the first day“ when your “love tank“ is constantly being filled. That was such a good book for us to read before we got married. I know that Will feels loved through words of affirmation and gifts. My “love tank“ is full by quality time mostly, then probably touch. It made the transition of never living with someone before, or being used to real married life so much easier. This year was totally a year of learning so much about eachother, and adjustments and growth together, and it was such a blessing from God.

Hurray for an awesome year!

Today is my mom’s birthday! Happy Bday!  she and my sister are in Kuwait seeing my dad. They called on our anniversary, and it sounds like they are having an awesome time. Okay I’m a little jealous because I’m stuck here with my feet propped up, and they are over there, but hopefully Will and I will get to visit soon after they move.

Not too much planned for today- I know you are shocked!  Thanks for all who read this entire thing- you are a brave soul!

More to come…

The weekend was nice. Actually, it was just “okay.” I was caught up doing homework and getting everything ready for my surgery. I am convinced I need to write out a detailed, numbered instruction sheet for Will on How to Wash Laundry, and How to Load the Dishwasher. Bless his heart, I know he thinks he is helping when he rinses the dishes, but I think he may be unaware that they don’t just “jump” into the dishwasher on their own… hopefully I won’t have a pile of rinsed dishes to place in the washer when I get home.

My big surgery “debut” will be tomorrow at 8:00. I am getting really nervous! I mean, I know the worst part of it will be the recovery, but I am still nervous about getting in a gown and getting an IV and everything else! Yikes! I am just glad that I will be too drugged up to remember anything afterwards.

So I am hearing this terrible rumor that I am going to have to wear these incredibly embarassing shoes afterwards for like 6 weeks. There is no way. Call me stupid or superficial if you want, but there is no way I am wearing these duckbill shoes for a month to school and work. I will hobble around in something, just not those PLEASE!  I guess I better see how my feet feel after everything is done before I go running my mouth about “never wearing those embarrasing shoes!“ Anybody have to wear these? I guess this surgery is common in women because we wear terrible, uncomfortable shoes on a constant basis… just because it completes our outfit.. without ever thinking of their practicality, or taking into consideration comfort.  I think it was Marilyn Monroe who said something like she wanted to hug the man who invented the high heel… sorry Marilyn… I love ya… but you could not be more wrong in this situation.

So anyway, that’s about all that is going on today. After my internship I am going to pick up our big wedding picture we finally got framed! I can’t wait to see it!

Have a good evening!!

Today is so exciting. I know a lot of people think it is a commercialized holiday to sell flowers, candy, and jewlery, but I’m a typical girl and I still get giddy at the thought of V-Day. This is our first married Valentine’s Day, so thats exciting too. A man at our church owns a large flower store in town and asked Will to help him deliver flowers as a fundraiser for the youth group. So Will enlisted his dad to be the van driver while Will makes the deliveries. Its a long day, he actually got up before I did this morning!

Saturday night we went over to Will’s parents and ate dinner and watched Troy. We also got our valentine’s day gifts from them. I got a cute OU shirt and some good smelling lotions and soaps. Then last night we went over to my moms and got our gifts. She really spoils us. Its funny how practical our gifts are now that we’re married. There was a time that I had to “borrow” some toilet paper and dishwashing soap from my mom because we decided to use our money to buy OU season tickets instead of groceries (We are young and stupid I guess).  Anyway, in our bags there was a huge pack of toilet paper and Electrosol dishwashing tabs. Then we each got a Wal-Mart gift card and cash. Plus way too much candy. That was great. My mom always overdoes it on “small” holidays, but I’m not complaining.

I got Will OU vs Baylor b-ball tickets. That’s a story in itself. I was so proud of my idea to get him these tickets because I had been hearing how incredible Baylor was doing and how they could win it all. So I got the tickets thinking this was going to be such an awesome game. Well, I’m terrible about getting excited about gifts I got people and wanting to tell them before the day comes, so I dropped some hints about OU b-ball and asked how Baylor was doing. Will then proceeded to tell me how terrible they were this year and how everyone is beating them… it was the Baylor WOMEN who were doing so well… not the MEN! I was so disappointed and Will could read it all over my face. He eventually guessed my “best ever” surprise. We had a good laugh and held eachother on the couch. So, he already knows his gift, but thats not a big deal. I also had a heart shaped cake made for him that says Go Sooners beat Baylor, so that will be a surprise.

I guessed Will’s gift for me, or at least I think I did! I think I’m getting a pair of shoes I’ve been wanting, so we’ll wait and see. We’re going to eat tonight, and then I have to go home and study away. I have a huge test tomorrow, so that will be the end to a wonderful day, yuck. <3

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

-ee cummings

The Forgotten Paycheck and Lysol in my Hand
Can you believe it? I actually forgot to get paid yesterday. I had to laugh to myself for being so scatterbrained. Will , however, did not find it as amusing. So if the lights go out tonight, I guess it’s my fault! ha ha

Today in one of my health classes we had an extensive presentation about household germs. The study followed 10 “neat freak“ families and how they cleaned their kitchens. They then tested for some of the major bacterias like ecoli and staph. In every single kitchen there were traces of them, and in 8 of the 10 the levels were dangerous! I’m thinking, “okay, these are neat freaks’ houses?! What about ‘normal’ houses??“ It truly got me thinking about spraying the house down with Lysol!

Tonight is Will’s “Friday.” Since he works on Sunday, he gets tomorrow off. He is so sweet. He “gave” that day to me about a year ago, so every Friday we get to hang out when I get done with school and we do whatever I have planned. Tomorrow, however, he is going to be helping his dad with some landscape stuff (his dad is a landscape contractor), so I get the day to myself. I think I’ll use to to get much needed homework and other odds and ends done… like sanitizing the house!

PS-Will and Britt pics to come