Because I'm Terrible at Scrapbooks

south beach idiot

love:
1. CEREAL
2. French fries
3. Chocolate
4. Krispe Kremes
5. Fruit

I love them almost as much as I love the Sooners- and that’s a lot! smile

However, I am painfully bidding farewell to these foods, blessed by God. I know for sure he’s up there eating a bowl of Lucky Charms and laughing at me because he knows I’ll die without them.

That’s right girls. I am officially going to be a grump. I’m sure people will think I’m a smoker because of how edgy I will be the next 2 weeks of my life.

“What’s up with her!?”

I’m sure people will whisper that behind my back for a while.

I’ll just get this out in the open: I FREAKING LOVE CARBS!!
I do! I’m not ashamed to admit it! I know everyone gasps as if I’m some terrible fatty, but I love them. I have been so anti carb diets for the longest time, but I am officially becoming one of the South Beach Idiots, and I’m darn excited about it.

Will’s mom is Healthy Woman (I think she even has it tattooed on ther back- ha ha) and she has done lots of research into the diet. Will’s dad has diabetes and it big time runs in his family, and South Beach is a really good diet for diabetics. I really want to eat “good carbs” in hopes of Will not getting adult onset diabetes.

Plus, i’ve been following Christina’s journey and figure she’s still alive and actually seems very happy with the way the diet is going. I think I can survive and actually continue to be excited about the diet too- after the first 2 weeks of greuling hell.

So, here I am, after 3 pieces of “I love you and I’m sorry I have to leave you” chocolate, I’m getting ready to get on the wagon. I start Saturday.

“Oh Lord, please help my friends and coworkers love me without my daily cereal. Help me to live a civilized life during this time.”

So today’s post is dedicated to all the wonderful foods I’ve loved thus far. You’ve been good to me… except for the fact that I’ve gained 8 pounds… wait a minute… you’re not good to me! You have a conspiracy to inflate me! I’m on to you! I know what you’re up to! How could I have been so blind!? I thought we had something so good going!

Ugh.

I hate carbs.

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 1.04.2006

major jet lag

Back in Kuwait.

Back to work today.

I am suffering terrible jet lag.

My vacation is officially over.

The heat is cranked.

They are acting like we live in Siberia and need the indoor thermometer to read 104- just to remind us of the heat we live in year round.

My back is sweaty from being pressed up against my chair all day and I am totally regretting my warm sweater.

As if that weren’t bad enough, I am having a terrible hair day.

Sigh.

Oh, and happy new year by the way.

We got into Kuwait at midnight of the 2nd. Our ride forgot to pick us up which meant we had the fun of hailing an Arabic speaking taxi driver.  There’s something funny about this whole ordeal, but I’m too tired to even mess with it.

Can you sense my “chipperness?”

We got “home” around12:45 to another freaking geyser in our spare bathroom. If you’ve read for a while you know we’ve had problems with this bathroom already. Needless to say, this was first on our “Someone must die for this” list.

We had to call our haras and have him come and fix it. He didn’t. Finally, out of sheer frustration, Will just asked for the wrench and told him he would fix it and return the wrench in the morning.

My sweet handyman.

Afterwards, Will was wired and I was tired (he slept most of the way. I hate sleeping in airplanes). I fell in to bed and was out. I slept for about an hour and then Will came and sat with me. Even though I was still really tired, I was so glad he came by me. We had such a great time on vacation together. I actually got to see my husband on weekdays! It was this strange thing that I think most couples do on a nightly basis. I felt so normal.

I just nudged myself right next to him and cuddled. I think the whole reality of everything (being back, having to go back to work- a place I loathe, being away from family, etc) plus exhaustion just got to me and I sobbed for so long. Huge, elephant tears, huge sighs of trying to catch my breath.

I have been so sensitive the last few days. I’ve cried about everything! I I am a creature of habit, and when big things change- like my life being totally tuned around from what I thought, I don’t handle it well! My heart has been extremely softened during the latter part of our vacation, mostly because I knew we were going to leave. You’d think I was constantly PMSing or something. Will just held me tight and listened to me cry and talk and unload everything. We lay there for a while, trying to go to sleep but we just ended up talking for the longest time. Talking intimately, about our feelings and thoughts. It was so nice, and very refreshing. 

We ended up getting out of bed around 2 in the morning since we couldn’t sleep. We unpacked and watched some Frasiers. We went back to bed around 7 and slept all the way until noon.

That wasn’t the plan!

We had hoped to get up around 9 to ensure we had little jet lag.

Ha.

We got up at noon, ate, and watched some King of Queens. We then had yet another conversation about the fact that we were back here, which led to more tears on my part (there seems to be a theme right now).

Will really strengthens me. He admitted he was just as sad as I was. We talked about that for a long time- about our families, and our plans, and our goals. I am so blessed to have Will. He is the only reason I can get through living here. I could go on and on, but I know you’re about to throw up as it is. smile

After that we went back to bed around 2 in the afternoon, with the strict rule of getting up at 4. As you probably already know, we didn’t get up until 6:30. Ugh. I could already feel the jet lag setting in.

By that time I was totally wide awake. We just laid in bed talking, yet again. I so love spending time with Will. He made me feel so loved and strong yesterday. I’m still getting the feel of this grown-up go to work thing and I was feeling sad about it because working here is really different from working a “normal” job back home. We did a great deal of talking about why I felt the way I did.

Did I mention yesterday was a VERY draining day? It was like some sort of culture shock of being back, really being back.

I told Will so many deep things, things maybe I’ll share one day, and he just listened, brushed the tear-matted hair out of my face and comforted me.

After our 50th “I’m sad we’re back” conversation of the day, we got out of bed- again- and were WIDE awake. Not tired at all.

We hung around the house and finally tried to give sleeping another go. We went to bed around 11:30. I just laid there, and I knew Will was just doing the same. Finally he nudged me to see If I was awake. We tried for about 10 minutes to go to sleep when Will finally said, “Let’s watch a Frasier and give sleep another go afterwards.”

Good idea.

We watched an episode and went back to bed after midnight. I dozed for about an hour and was up around 1:15. I laid there for 2 hours, tossing and turning, thinking and thinking. Will woke up around 3:30 and we finally decided to forget thying to get a good night’s sleep. We would just have to suffer all day today (which we are!).

We watched 2 Fraisers and then we got ready for the day.

I miss Will so much. We went from being around eachother everyday, back to our normal schedule. Will was so nurturing yesterday and I so wish he were back beside me as I went to work today. I’m so glad we had our vacation. It was the best.

I actually got to see him for a second today. He had to come to my camp for a meeting (ha, come to my camp. That sounds like we’re Indians meeting for a pow wow or something)

This post was sort of pointless! Sorry.  I mostly talked about our crazy sleep patterns with inserts about how doting on great I think Will is! Sorry, as you already know (because you know know exactly how much sleep I got to the very second I got last night) my brian isn’t properly functioning. I am totally exhausted and am so glad today is Tuesday and tomorrow is our Friday.

I got some badnews about Will’s schedule which really bummed me out. He is going to have to work 6 days for the foreseeable future, so that is a bummer. My parents are out of town for their vacation right now, but when they come back I’ll probably spend some time with them While Will works.

Why can’t I just become a millionaire and not have to deal with work and schedules and hostile people! Ha, don’t we all wish that!?

Wow. I’m done.. I’m sure there’s other things I want to talk about but I feel delerious (in a literal sense) and can’t really type them out right now. My mind is all over the board.

sorry for being so negative today. I’m entitled to that once in a while, right? I’m human. I know things will seem better once I get back into a normal schedule, but the next couple of weeks might be difficult.

Hmm, I’m leaving something out....

oh well. I hope to be more of myself tomorrow! Thanks for reading my confusing blog, I love you very much.

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 1.03.2006

Oklahoma How My Heart Misses You So

I feel like I owe you all a normal post. smile

I have to say I love you all. I don’t know if you guys will EVER know how much I appreciate our friendship. Your feedback cheered me on a day when I needed lots of cheering, but we’ll get to all that later.

Last night, as I was trying my hardest to go to sleep I had a deep revelation. I’ll skip all the long boring stuff and cut to the chase. If someone were to seriously ask me who my friends were I would probably stop for a second and begin on a long ramble list of all my nestie friends all over the country! I really would! Being in Kuwait has GREATLY limited my ability to have friends, so in a lot of ways you crazy girls who I honestly don’t really “know” are my friends! Okay- enough with my silly thoughts. Anyway, once again, thanks for your sweet feedback.

Today has been a rough day. We are headed back to Kuwait tomorrow. Today was a day of last minute errands and actually realizing that “this is it.” It could be a long time before we go home again, and that was really hard for me.

Our house closed yesterday, which made me cry.

I drove by my parent’s house, the house I grew up in, which made me cry.

We went by “our spot,” the place we went on our first date, during our courtship, where we got engaged, where we went when we were first married to talk, and probably where I’ll birth my first child (ha ha, just kidding), and I cried some more.

I just feel so small.

I have no idea what God has planned for us, and the fact that I add worries and craziness to the situation just clouds things even more. Leaving here is going to be hard tomorrow! I am so homesick and I haven’t even left home.

Will is so optimistic, and he made me feel a lot better about things. He said in some ways he was excited to go back because we no longer owe anyone anything, we can start saving, and if we were to stay in Oklahoma we would kick ourselves in Sept of 08 when we realzied that our time in Kuwait would have been over and we could have been in much better shape. He’s right, but it sure doesn’t make it easy! We sat and talked in the courtyard and kissed under the mistletoe (theres LOTs of it here) and I felt okay, but still sad. We bought the Purpose Driven Life and are going to read it together. I’m excited about that. I so want us to follow God’s plan and not our plan, and I think doing this study together will be really good for us.

Gosh, this is a boring post, isn’t it? Sorry, I guess my heart is just really full of emotions right now and I’m sort of robotically typing things out to take my mind of the fact that tomorrow I will making the trek back to lonely Q8.

Did I say how much I appreciate your friendship!?

You probably think I’m some cavewoman that has no friends and has lots of cats and eats lots of Duncan Hines cake mix out of the box. Okay, I know I may sound a little pathetic, but it’s not the case. I just have no one to relate to or really close to my age (besides Ethel, and I like her, but that’s all I’ve got) to call a friend, so I really do love our little nest community. <3

So, I hope you all celebrate lots for me tomorrow night! We will be in the air on new years eve- which, according to ALL women, is THE most romantic and thrillng way to ring in the new year (ha ha)!

I love you ladies, I truly do. Thanks for always being there and just letting me be me- even when I don’t always know what that means! smile

And to you, my beloved Sooner State, I miss you terribly already. Let’s just say “see ya later pardner” because I can’t bear to say anything else. <3 <3

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.30.2005

Awkward Moments in Tulsa

Before I begin, please just let me let out a HUGE scream of about 10 different emotions, including Joy, Frustration, Relief:

AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay. I honestly feel a lot better having done that. Now I can attempt to paste my collage of events as best I can.

So many things have happened the last few days (I’m not lying when I say many) and, as usual, I am terrible at putting sequence of events together. I wish you all knew how many dozens of times I thought to myself, “I can’t wait to tell the girls about this.” Oh, I have lots of stories to tell but I’m afraid for time’s sake I can only tell one or two.

We had adventrues in Tulsa the last few days. “Adventures” is a word that can take on many, many meanings, and you’ll get to rejoin me on some of them.

I tend to be a “nicey” (I’m a dork, but that’s what I call it) most of the time but on Wednesday my heart was in foul condition! I was anything but “Jesusly” that morning and boy did I look like a huge fat idiot.

Have you ever said the dumbest thing in the world for everyone around to hear? Yeah. Welcome to my world. I am the queen of stupid comments. My problem is that whenever I say something dumb, a crowd always seems to be around.

Wednesday morning we got up early and got ready to go see will’s grandparents in Tulsa. “Raymond (Brian’s friend or yet to be named girlfriend)” was driving up behind us because she lives there. Will and I were in the garage, by the door leading from the garage to the house, when I said something totally stupid and shallow. Yes, I’m going to get daggers for this stupid comment!

I said, “Will, do you think I look prettier than HER (a big ugly emphasis on the word her) today?”

Now, why would I say something that stupid to Will, you might ask. good question. I have no idea. Pretty dumb and unnecessary- I know- you don’t have to tell me again. Anyway, I said that and as the words left my mouth she was standing at the door and then simply just shut it.

I looked at Will horrified, “Do you think everyone (because everyone-that’s right, the whole freaking family- was standing by the open door) heard!?” He looked at me in shock and first told me he thought it was dumb that I said that and second that yes, everyone did hear.

Hi.

My name is Brittny.

And yes, I am apparently extremely shallow and terrible.

That’s me.

What was I thinking!? What in the world would possess me to say something so randomly pointless and vain!? As soon as the words left my mouth I felt big conviction- after the feeling of having to puke all over Will’s shoes because of embarrassment and worry, of course. I think God thought I was a big idiot at that point. I even think I heard him say, “Britt- you are a really big idiot.” Okay, only joking. I’m sure God is like the only person at that point in time that DIDN’T tink I was a shallow idiot, but I don’t think he was chuckling with old Peter about my stupid comment.

The whole ride up was hell. I prayed the entire time. My heart was in terrible condition and I really had to say “Sorry” for my behavior. I worried and worried and couldn’t say anything because Will’s parents were in the car with us. My stomach churned the whole way up. gosh, why do I say stupid things?

So I decided to overcompensate by being extra super nice- loike a REALLY big nicey- when we stopped in OKC for lunch. I mean, I was like REALLy nice.

Rule #1- If you blast a tacky comment in front of your whole In-Law family you are a huge idiot. You only make it like 10 times worse if you are extra nice.

I know this from expreience.

Anyway, so lunch was fine. Awkward for me, but fine.
I really think “Raymond” likes me. I so know she does.

ha

Yeah, so that was awkward moment number one. Enough about that. Gosh, I’ve rambled on with that one for a really long time and I really need to get off soon! I guess I’ll only share one more.

Oh crap is this a funny one.

The only downside is that Will made me promise not to post about 85% of it (yeah, it’s THAT darn good) because he didn’t want to embarrass people. Sigh. He took most the fun out of this one, but I’ll go ahead and share anyway.

We went up to see Will’s grandparents in Tulsa Wednesday night. The initial plan (only talked about like 1 time) was that we would get a hotel because his grandpa’s house it sort of small for everyone- plus there is only one bathroom.

Rule #2: Always nail down plans before you get into your host’s home. If theings aren’t set in stone before then, you look really dumb saying, “But sweetie, I would really like to have a bathroom.” (<- I think that is what my MIL wanted to say to my FIL)

We shuffled our feet around 9:00 about what to do. “It’;s up ot you. We can stay here and that will be fine.” Will and Brian said that to their parents about a million times, and my inlaws said that to me and Will about the same. I think My MIL really wanted to get a hotel, but because she didn’t say, “Dang it! I want a hotel room!” before we got inside Will’s grandpa’s house, the message and women nonverbal “hints” (<- you all know these hints, I don’t have to go into them) were not conveyed.

we stayed at the house.

that was fine with me- but sort of awkward. Will’s cousin is currently staying in one of the rooms, so that only left one free room for the whole family.

Brian took a cot in the living room,

My FIL took the couch,

and Will took the easy chair.

Do you know what that means?

Yes.

I got to sleep with my MIL.

Surprisingly enough, this wasn’t the first time to shack up with my MIL. I actualy got to have that fun a couple of years ago, before Will and I were even married! Yeah, that was awkward.

There are some hiliarious things that should now be insterted in this post, but because of my promise I must move on.

Its a king size bed and we sure utilized the space. Jenny was California, I was Maine. You have no idea. There was like an ocean between us.

I wanted to move,but I didn’t dare. I seriously thought. “Okay, Brittny. Try your most statuesque pose. Pretend you are in an art class and someone is trying to draw you.” I promise, I really thought that. I don’t know why I didn’t want to move, but I just didn’t. I was like frozen, numb. I didn’t even want to make a sound to swallow. I held my spit in my mouth as long as I could before I finally just realized how crazy I was and swallowed.

I lay on my back, staring at the ceiling with my eyes wide open playing a mental game of Outlast. There was no freaking way I was going to fall asleep before her. I wasn’t going to start talking in my sleep or having yet another sex dream with her still awake.

Oh no, I don’t think so. That lady was going to go to sleep first, I was going to see to that.

I got into position and was ready to go as long as it took to ensure I was the last asleep. Apparently, she too was playing Outlast. We lay there for minutes without a deep breath or little snore, absolutely no sign of sleep from either of us. All of a sudden my stupid left butt cheek started to itch like crazy. It was if little Butt Fairies came to get me off my post. To get me to move, to budge, to lose this war.

“Okay Brittny, you can do this. Mind over matter. Just don’t focus on your itch.”

Ha. Easier said than done.

There was no way I was oing to make a move, no matter how many stupid Butt Fairies were there to taunt me. I waivered back and forth over what the big deal with moving was but decided at this point, after my big stupid comment day, I was terrified of my MIL and wouldn’t move. I wasn’t moving one inch.

One Point for Brittny, Zero for the Butt Fairies.

Then, I had quite possible the funneist thing ever (yes, maybe the funniest thing EVER) to occur. Gosh I wish I could tell you. It ties in with the first stuff I had to promse not to post about. I’ll put it this way- all of a sudden a song popped in my head that sort of served as a theme to what I had previsouly seen just an hour before. Tears streamed down by face. I literally clenched my lip so that I wouldn’t bust out in controllable, wake the neighborhood, laughter. It was quite possibly the hardest thing I have ever had to do (that and one time I had to hold my laughter at my cousin’s wedding because someone sang a song about Only having 26 letters to show his love and I had no idea what that meant. I kept counting phrases on my fingers like, “I love you” and “I want to spend the rest of my life with you” to see if it equaled 26 letters. I asked my sister what it meant and I thoutght she was going have a coronary from fighting laughter. Apparently it was the alphabet. Go figure. Now thatlaughter, ladies, was hard to hold in. This was just as bad.).

Oh did I want to laugh. I had to try to stop the laughter so (and I really said this to myself. This is so stupid) I thought, “Okay britt. Imagine you are anne frank and heard a noise and you have to be super quiet!” The fact that I actually thought that made me want to laugh even harder.

It was quite a night.

I could go on but this post is really really long!
The crazy thing ist hat I have so much more to say!!

If you have learned anything from this post remember not to be an idiot in front of your inlaws. wink

I missed you guys so much! Have a wonderful Christmas! I can’t wait to read all about it!

<3
Merry CHRISTmas.

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.23.2005

Everybody Loves Raymond

I have about 10 things I’m almost DYING to tell you- but I freaking can’t. That is almost the WORST thing you can do to me. Fill me with lots of information that HAS to be let out and then say, “but...”

Okay. I don’t really have any secrets, but there are somethings I really want to talk about but feel like I’m in the WPP (witness protection program) for the time being while I’m under the inlaws’ roof. I’m sure you can understand.

So, now that I told you all the good stuff has to remain under wraps, I’ve got nothin’!

Will’s brother brought his future wife/girlfriend/I have no other idea what title she really is friend over tonight. She drove all the way down in the freezing rain from Tulsa to the house. I guess if you are willing to risk your life to get here, you must be serious with the guy.

I have to be honest (yes, I am about to let out a terrible and horrible truth to you guys so you think I’m totaly terrible), I kindof felt a little like the first child that has the baby sister brought home from the hospital. Everyone is just enammered with every drool, burp, and smile.

Am I terrible for saying that?

Don’t answer.

I already know I am.

Okay. I’m embarrassed I even said that. I know you are probably thinking, “What a terrible green monster! Ooooo! Your MIL has a potential new daughter-in-law! big deal!!”

Yeah, I know.

I guess it’s not a big deal, in fact, she seems pretty great, I guess that was just my initial thought. I think Will might have felt that way a little too. I mean, here we are, after dropping almos $4300 on plane tickets before even buying Christmas presents and everything else, and his brother decides this is the perfect weekend to have his whatever she is- friend, girlfriend, whatever- over to stay the week. Plus, his brother is leaving us on Christmas day to go to Branson with her family. I know that hurt Will, especially since we wont be home for Christmas next year.

Okay, I guess I should shut up. I know you think I’m terrible. i’m sorry, but I guess I needed to get it out. Brian has really gotten to Will the last few days, so I don’t want to talk to him about my ridiculous feelings because he’s already had his fill of talking about his brother. So, because of that, it means I get to vent to you lucky ladies! What a fun time.

I know I’m being hasty. I’ve hardly talked to her. They went out almost as soon as she got here. I need to get off the computer and spend some time talking to her. Afterall, she could be my sister-in-law. It’s bound to happen sometime, right? I better just get used to it and hope he doesn’t plan a huge proposal surprise the next time we’re home for 2 weeks. smile

I so wish I could add my pithy and snide comments to this post, but I’m terrifed and must remain in the WPP for the remainder of this vacation.

So, although I have about 5 more paragraphs that really could be tacked on to this post, I must say goodbye.
Thanks for listening to me rant about something stupid and petty. I know I look pretty childish, but just look past that and love me despite my dumb fault.

<3

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.18.2005

Blings and Things

I wanted to jump on today because who knows the next time I’ll post (ha. I always say that and the most I ever go is a few days).

Things in the land of the Sooners are great. Will is currently watching one of the Star Wars with his dad, and Jenny is doing Christmas cards (like all good wives do… which I did not do… which by this premise I guess means I am not a good wife), so I thought I would jump on and post.

Will and his dad got home last night, so that was nice. One less day of awkwardness, but many more to follow. smile Yesterday I helped Jenny at the school. I forgot how little 1st graders were, but I did not forget why I do not want to have children for 37.6 years (haha). I don’t know how she does it… yes I do.

She is perfect.

Period.

That is why.

After that we went to WALMART! I don’t care what you say, I freaking love that place. I never realized how much I loved Walmart until it was ripped away from me. I wanted to lay in every aisle doing pretend snow angels while singing “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” By the way, our Walmart did say “the C word.” I guess its because we’re in the Bible belt.

After that we headed home. Brian, Will’s younger brother, is a Vet student at OSU (yes, I know we still claim him even though he goes to OSU). Believe me, there is bedlam during football season! He brought home a playmate for the family dog. It is the cutest little beagle named Baylis- the name of a parasite. Brian informed us Baylis had been quite a parasite to him while he had her, hence the name. She was the first live pet he operated on, so it’s pretty cool he adopted her and brought the little parasite home. smile We watched her meet Sandy for a bit, and then finally Will came home.

Not only did he come home, but he came bearing gifts!

I’m a big surprise person, but I’m terrible with them. I always want Will to surprise me at Christmas, but for some dumb reason I always want to guess what he is going to get me. I’m so confusing.

Anyway, I had an idea what my Christmas present was, and I was right. Will had bought my present on his trip and wanted to give it to me last night because he was excited about them. He bought me beautiful, sparkly, diamond earrings! They are gorgeous. Now, if you remember, we had previoiusly set a $50 limit on eachother. As you already know, he didn’t do so well sticking to that rule. Well, now I feel like a big loser because I actually stuck to the limit and he didnt. Sigh. He went above and beyond that’s for sure. I felt like such a special girl. That was last night’s surprise.

Today was a pretty good day too. We ran a couple of errands and then went to our house. We are supposed to finalize everything with the sale next week. It has been tough for me to let go, but I know that is the best decision for us.

We walked in and I just lost it. I cried and cried. We went to each room and I cried and talked about our memories in our first house, and our first year of marriage. It was just a terribly emotional time today. It still smelled like I remember. It smelled like “Will and Brittny’s house.” That may sound weird, but oh well. I guess today was sort of like closure for me, but it was a difficult lesson, that’s for sure! We stood over where our couch was, where we had so many great memeories being goofy and lazy, and just hugged eachother. I got lots of pictures of our empty house, but I still have the memories of when it was once full of our humble accomodations. I got myself together a little better and we went home for just a few minutes and then we were off again!

We decided a long time ago we wanted to have a get together for our youth (for those of you who may not know, Will was a youth pastor before we moved to Kuwait). We invested so much of ourselves in them, and we wanted to see them one last time, while things were still fresh. Does that make sense? I guess what I mean is that after this time we will probably never see most of them again and it just wouldn’t have the same impact as it would now. Okay, I’m being confusing. smile

Anyway, we had pizza and gave each of them a gift card to the Christian bookstore so they could buy a cd. It was good to see them again, and I know they were glad too. I guess yet another facet of closure for me.

I am thrilled. Tomorrow I get to go to “real” church. You have no idea how excited I am. It has been 7 months since I’ve gone to a real church service, so my spirit is so thirsty so be there. We’re going to early service, which is very early. I”m surprised God even wakes up that early. smile

Tomorrow afternoon we are off to “the City” to watch the Hornets game! I’m really excited about that. It should be lots of fun.

Well, today was sort of a boring post. Sorry. However, it is so important for me to “document” (ha. document, as if this is some massive page in the world’s history) this trip. I so want to look back and remember everything I did, so when I get down and my heart aches for home, I will have my silly little blog to warm my heart up again.

Okay, you thought I was closing this (and so did I), but aha! I am not. I just heard what might possibly be one of the top 5 worst sounds you can ever hear: My mother in law violently vomitting all over herself. Ugh. no fun. I am 2 rooms away! I really hope she is okay. there is some bad virus going around.

Okay, enough with that fun. I will say goodbye for now. smile Have a great rest of the weekend and watch the Hornets beat up on the Spurs tomorrow night (ha!). smile

<3

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.17.2005

a day with Mom, a day with Dad

I considered conquering the world today, but I figured I just better stick to writing this goofy blog. That’s about all I can handle while on vacation. smile We’ll mess with the world thing another day.

So far, so good. I wanted to kill Will on a sporadic basis the last couple of days, but you have currently caught me on a good day where he is once again perfect and can do no wrong.

How should I get you to that point?

Hmmmm

Okay, well Wednesday Will left me alone with his dad half of the day. Yeah, THAT is not awkward. I know for some people It’s not, but for me it sort of was. Will’s dad is awesome. I think he is just totally great, but I have literally NOT SPOKEN to his parents in almost 7 months! That’s a long time. So, maybe you’re thinking, “Well you had a whole afternoon to catch up.” Ha, thanks for the observation, but I could have used Will with me during those catching up moments.

I guess I’m being too critical. It was actually a pretty good time. We made tuna for lunch and talked baout our extended families. Then, he took me to my dentist appointment and ran and errand while I was in the chair. Afterwards, we went to the grocery store because he was going to make his “famous” potato soup.

Minus the terribly awkward moment of hearing George Michael’s “Father Figure” on the radio, it was a pretty fun afternoon. I have to say , though, that was a pretty awkward moment. I mean, do you just ignore it and try to think of some deep, 3 minute conversation you can have to blast over the radio, or do you acknowledge the song and it’s uncomfortable implications and the fact that your father-in-law is sitting right next to you as Geroge Michael sings on about sex. hmmm. He opted to ignore it and frankly, I think that was good move.

Anyway, the grocery store was fun. I truly love grocery shopping. I think it’s great. I know, i’m weird. We got some stuff for our soup, and then we went home and I helped him cook!

It turned out to be a pretty okay day. While I wished Will was there to help me out a little, I did just fine on my own. I mean, I’ve known them for a while now, but I figured the whole 7 months and no talking thing would make things strange, but it was fine. I guess its because I’ve been given the gift of gab. smile

Yesterday I got yucky with Will for the dumbest reason, but at the time I felt justified, darn it!

Will and his dad are very very close and planned a one night father and son outing. I thought that would be a special time for him and his dad, so I was totally supportive. However, yesterday I learned it was going to be a two night outing and I got alittle frustrated.

Yes, hurl, “BOOO, you’re a terrible and selfish wife!” at me, I probably deserved it. I just was really not wanting to spend 2 days by myself. I know, I was being really immature.

We ended up resolving everything and I ended up feeling like a jerk for some of the morning, but c’mon help me out a LITTLE here girls, I had a tiny bit of justification, right? I mean, Will’s mom is great, but frankly her timidity scares me because I never know what to say. We have always gotten along, but again, the whole 7 months thing and no talking sort of worried me.

Well, Will left and we were totally back to normal (you know, the I think you’re great and have never been a total idiot kind of normal. ha ha), and I no longer wanted to take a huge fruit cake to his head. Jenny was at work yesterday anyway, so it wasn’t that big of a deal.

I went to my hair appointment, which was glorious. I LOVE American hair stylists! I go to British ladies, and they’re okay, but they’re freaking expensive. Anyway, I had so much fun catching up and talking to my lady. They are like your best friends-you just pick up where ever you left off.

After that , I thought I would spite my dream from the other day (I don’t know if this is a bad thing or a good thing), and I went to Victoria’s Secret and bought a naughty outfit to wear tomorrow when Will comes home. ha ha. hopefully that won’t bite me in the butt! smile

I came home, talked to a good friend wink for a while and hung out with Jenny the rest of the night. She did her lesson plans (she is a teacher), while I watched a SemiHomemade Christmas with Sandra Lee (for the record, I both love and hate that woman. She’s terrbily great). We had a good time and I felt sort of silly for getting worked up about the whole thing. We are getting on just like we never left. I guess that’s what family is.

I’m getting ready to get off and make myself presentable for the day. I’m going up to Jenny’s school to help. I’m excited. It should be lots of fun. I’m going to spend the afternoon there and then after school I’m going to help take down her Christmas stuff and get her room ready for the break. It should be a pretty “okay” afternoon. Will’s brother is coming home tonight too, so that should be fun. I know he is welcoming a break!

Will and his dad are coming home sometime tomorrow. I am so ready for him to be home. We’ve gone from being around eachother every second this past week, to nothing at all! I’ll be ready to see him again.

Let me tell you, there is nothing weirder than sleeping in your husband’s childhood bed alone with your MIL downstairs. It felt so werid to me, I don;’t know why, but it did! smile

Okay, enough rambling for now. I don’t know if I’ll jump on this weekend (of course, you know me enough by now to know I’m going to try!). I have a feeling we’ll be busy with family stuff. We’re going to a Oklahoma City/New Orleans Hornet (they are originally the NO Hornets, but after the hurricane they moved games to OK City) game Sunday, so that should be lots of fun!

Have a great weekend if I don’t jump on before that!

Talk to you soon!

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.16.2005

the nanny cam

Last night I had the nightmare of all nightmares.

The kind of nightmare that is so horrifying that you wake in the middle of your sleep, disoriented about reality and fantasy.

The kind of nightmare that leaves you shaking and in a cold sweat. I tossed and turned the rest of the night after I woke from this terrible dream, afraid that it would happen again. I kept asking my self over ane over, “Was this really a dream, or did this happen?” I was freaking out all last night.

It wasn’t a dream about Michael Myers, the psycho killer from the Hallowwen movies.

No, it was worse than that.

It wasn’t about going to The Limited and buying everything my heart desired only to have my credit card cut at the register.

Though that is about as horrifying as any dream can get, ladies, it was even worse than that!

Now, picture the scariest thing you can think of.

Got it?

THAT was what my dream was about!

My mother-in-law.

I was seriously in and out of sleep all last night after my dream. My eyes were wide open, staring at the white ceiling, just reeling about whether or not the series of events were real or fake. It felt so real, I kept thinking.

Okay, before I go any farther I should clarify that my MIL is not the scariest thing on earth, in fact she might be the closest comparison to Jesus I have ever in my whole life seen. Move over Billy Graham! Jennys comin’! I guess, in a way, she DOES scare me because her heart is so good and pure and, well, “good!” That’s the only word I can think of right now. I’m afraid to joke or do anything! I’m like a Barbie doll with a plastic smile glued to my face because I’m afraid to do anything stupid, so I just smile away! smile haha. She is great, she really is. I won’t say anymore about her, I’ll just get on with the dream!

Now that you know how wholesome Will’s mom is, you can better understand my dream. I had a dream she caught us in the act… not working on some play scene… YOU KNOW what “act” I’m talking about.

It was such a real dream! We were in the middle of everything when all of a sudden she comes up with a pile of laundry and just opens the door and stands there, crying, and says,

“Here is your dirty laundry, but it looks like you already have some!”

and then she drops the pile and runs off. I was just on top of Will dumbfounded.

I seriously woke up right after that and had to look around the room to make sure it was just a dream. I patted myself down to make sure I had clothes on, and then I was paranoid the whole rest of the night. I kept thinking there was no way I would ever be comfortable enough to have sex with Will in this house because we used to laugh about how his mom probably had secret cameras everywhere- which then sent my mind on a whole new tangent.

“Does she have a secret camera!? Did she watch me pick my nose this afternoon?! Oh Lord, please somehow disable the cameras. Burn the film with your eyes or something.”

I asked Will if we made love that evening and he just grunted, so then I told Will about my dream and he just rolled his eyes and told me to go back to sleep. Ha- that may be easy for you, but I have Donna Reed downstairs, watching me on a NannyCam this very second! I can’t just go back to sleep! Those are the kind of dreams you just don’t ever want to have. It’s like she got in my mind or something. We were like sharing a brain through some strange unexplainable phenomenon. IT was like she “Sent“ that dream to me to say, “Do not ever touch my baby boy in a sexual way in this house.“ I feel like I have to tell her the only time I will ever touch her son is to conceive. Like I should say, “Scouts honor!” of something afterwards. She is so great and I feel so clumsy and goofy around her, and that dream didn’t help! It will be a major feat if we do the deed more than a couple of times on this trip.

To make matters worse, Will’s brother is coming home from college this weekend and will be staying next door. Ha, yeah, THAT doesn’t add to the awkwardness!

“Excuse me bro-in-law, me and your older brother are about to engage in some marital wrestling. Seriously. We’re working on our black belts. don’t mind the noise, okay?”

Do you think that excuse will work? I love Will’s family, but I finally am beginning to understand how he felt when he had to live with mine for 4 months, and I’ve only been here a few days!

Okay, I gotta shake it off! I can’t dwell on a silly dream, but I am fully convinced anytime Will’s mom looks art me it will be with “warning“ eyes. I have chills just thinking about it! smile

I have about two more things I want to post about regarding this subject, but I will have to do it another day because I have a dentist appointment (fun!..ha). I think I’ve given you enough. I’m sure you think I’m totally crazy, freaking out about a little dream, but trust me, you would so be the same way.

I guess I’ll go for now! I’m about to change the time on my blog to Central Time ZonE!! YAY! So exciting! I’ll finally be on normal time with you guys! smile

thanks for listening to my strangeness. this is the only place I have as an outlet!

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.14.2005

official trip talk posting from my heart

From My Heart

I don’t know where to start. I feel like I’ve been shot back to the army commissary in Germany when I was 6 years old.

I had wandered off, lost my mom and panicked! I went up and down the aisles, trying to find her and at the same time look somewhat normal, but in my heart I was full of tons emotions, mostly fear.

“I can’t live in this world by myself! Who will take care of me and reach the top shelf for my favorite cereal!?”

I remember seeing a classmate and her mom. I tried to keep calm and say hello instead of, “I can’t find my mommy!” I quickly waved, but was far too engulfed in finding the dark-haired lady I called, “mom.”

I remember the relief I felt when I went to the bread aisle and she was there. I felt like hugging her so tight and telling her I would never ever run away again. Ever.  Somehow I feel I’m about to experience traveling down the “bread aisle” all over again Thursday, but instead of finding the forever comfort of my mom, I will quickly find the truth: I can’t stay.

And so begins today’s post…

Last night Will and I hung out a bit, watched a couple Frasiers. Afterwards, he was going to check our Fantasy Football while I packed. That was the plan. A necessary and good plan. However, after Frasier I told Will I thought we needed a 30 minute power nap to get me ready for packing.

Ha.

We ended up sleeping until midnight. As Will got me up, and as I looked down at the clock on my phone, you would have thought it was Christmas Eve and I was 8 again. I was so tired, yet so full of jubilation. Through a groggy voice I let out, “We’re going home tomorrow Will! It’s really here!” I was so excited. It was all I could think about. The same thought was running through my head, over and over.  As we stumbled in the dark and into our room I told Will that for some reason I was just full of emotion and wanted to cry. I don’t know what made me feel that way. Maybe it was because I was so excited and full of the realization that the next day I would be home, in America, and everything that goes along with that just wells within me. I’m not really sure.

I just want to be home so badly. I know I’ve killed a dead horse with this subject, but that is where my heart is right now. Maybe you think, “If you want to be home so bad, why are you living in Kuwait?” I guess that’s a fair question. I’ve asked myself that too. Will and I have set goals and we really would like to see them accomplished. In the grand scheme of life three years isn’t that long, so while we may be homesick now, the end result is so much better than the present.

Its not like Kuwait is some terrible place. Kuwait is okay. We’ve lived a pretty normal existence here. It is just so different. They may have big, beautiful malls, and all the restaurants of home, but it is not home. It is not America. I live in a place where women won the right to vote this year and many still hide behind their veil- not because of Islam, but because of their domineering husbands.

I’ve been here so long that I actually saw a woman in a sleeveless, low cut shirt the other day and told my sister she looked sleazy! What am I, 50!? That would be totally normal in the states, heck I’ve seen it in church, but being over here totally changes your disposition on some things.

I’m living somewhere where Will and I could make a date out of going to a public hanging (not that we would do that, I’m just saying a lot of people do)and then hit Hard Rock for dinner. Kuwait has so many things that are LIKE being home, but that is all that it is- a fabrication of home, but not the real thing.  There are so many things I wish I could share with you, but typing just isn’t good enough when it comes to what I want to say. I want to say these things with my voice, not on paper.

As I get ready to leave tomorrow I don’t really know what to feel. I have a range of emotions and I can’t decide which is best. What is best… Probably that I am full of joy and relish each and every second I have in America, especially Oklahoma.

Will and I already know we won’t be home for Christmas next year (which totally depresses me, and I worry so much that I have already look ahead to NEXT year instead of living in THIS year. I really drive myself crazy with my worries), and while we will take a vacation sometime next year, it may not be home. So, I honestly don’t know when I will be in Oklahoma or even the States again. I really need to make the most of this opportunity.

My biggest fear is that I won’t want to come back. The grown-up, rational side of me tells me that I DO want to come back so that Will and I can plan and prepare for our future and feel so satisfied and proud of our accomplished mission when we come home. The emotional, 22-year-old side of me says, “Stay!! You know you want to, so do it!” I know that God has a plan for us, and I am really trying to seek him during this time. I know it is His desire for us to finish out our contracts (they are one year contracts), but I really don’t know after that. WE have OUR three year plan, but if I’m honest I haven’t really sought God on what to do after that.

I am just can’t contain myself. I keep looking at the clock wish it would speed along but somehow magically slow starting tomorrow evening. I know tonight will go quickly because I’m undertaking the dubious job of packing. Packing for 3 weeks is a pain. I always bring WAY too many things and only use about half of them. I think I’m going to cram almost everything in one suitcase so I leave plenty of room for our Christmas presents and Mall of America finds. I’m terrible at cramming too. I am perhaps the worst packer ever.

I think I’ve given you enough of me today. TOMORROW IS THE DAY!! I will be home with you guys on Thursday!!!!!!!! Don’t worry, I’ll be posting an itinerary so you will know all I’m up to (and the crowd roars with glee…not).

Thanks for putting up with me. That’s why I like you all so much. smile

posted in The Old Blog bullet permalink bullet 12.06.2005

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About

brittny I'm B-Love. Lover of God, my husband Will, my doggies, OU football, weight training, plyometrics healthy eating (mostly!), peanut butter, and all things health related. Buckle up and get ready for my constant embarrassing moments, health and fitness tips,and my effort to rely on Christ while living life in the real world. Follow me on Feedly! Sign up for monthly emails at blove@theblovelife.com!


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